Um, Haise?
by Judai Kun
Summary: Shirazu and Urie have become curious as to whether or not the carpets match the drapes of Haise Sasaki. They do everything they can think of to try and find out. Prequel of Um, Kaneki?


Prequel of Um, Kaneki?

Here is a link if ya wanna read it on my channel as Um, Kaneki?

Hey people, this is another randome thought that came to my head, much like the last one, I hope you enjoy :P :D

* * *

The Quinx squad was lazing about their home, waiting for Haise to return from a meeting. Urie was listening to music, Shirazu playing games, the other two squad member in their rooms. Shirazu put his game controller down, announcing to Urie that he was going to the toilet.

"Whatever (why are you telling me?)" Urie said back to the boy leaving the room.

Shirazu returned, standing in the doorway staring blankly at Urie, who wasn't paying attention to the boy. After being stared at for a few seconds, Urie sighed and turned to face the other.

"Whats do you want? (did your brain finally shut down from your stupidity?" Urie asked irritably.

"Hey Urie….do you think…. That Sassan's carpets match the drapes?"

"What? (why are you asking me?)"

"I mean, he said his hair is naturally that colour….so does that mean down there as well?"

"I, um…don't know." Urie replied a light pink dusting his cheeks.

"We should find out!" Shirazu said to the boy, a smirk forming on his lips.

"You can do it by yourself (I don't want to take part in something so childish)."

"C'mon, I'm sure your curious."

"Not at all (and even if I was I wouldn't tell you)."

"Well then…if I find out, I'm not gonna tell you."

"I don't care (idiot)."

"IIII'MMMMM HOOOMMMMEEE!" Haise sang, throwing the door open.

Urie jolted at his sudden appearance, face growing slightly pinker after the conversation he had just had with Shirazu. Uries eyes make their way down to Haise's crotch before quickly looking back to his face.

"Okay Shirazu, ive decided that I will help you (I've got nothing better to do)." Urie told the boy.

"What's going on?" Haise asked the two curiously.

"It's nothing Sassan!"

"Huh?" Haise asked confused by how quickly Shirazu answered.

"Don't worry Sasaki, it's really nothing." Urie said, an innocent smile making its way to his face, as he got up and left the room dragging Shirazu with him.

Haise was even more confused, since when did Urie have an innocent smile.

"Okay then….I guess I'll start making dinner."

At the word 'Dinner' Saiko stuck her head out of her room and yelled,

"DID SOMEONE SAY DINNER!"

"Yes I did, but it's not ready yet." Haise replied to the girl.

"Tell me when it's done." She ordered going back to what she was doing.

After Haise had finished making the meals, he waited for the reactions of his squad towards the food. After they had told him that it was edible, he left them be while he went to take a shower. In this time Urie look to Shirazu and said,

"Now is our chance (he will have his guard down)."

Shirazu smirked and and quickly gobbled down what was left of his food. He ran into his room and raced back out with a camera.

"How long have you had that (do you want to frame this picture or something, idiot)?" Urie asked.

"What are you two doing?" Tooru asked.

"We are going to find out if Sassans hair is the same colour as the hair in his lower region." Shirazu replied excitedly. "Do you two want to help?"

"N-NO!" Tooru replied stuttering and blushing.

Saiko simply said, "I would but I have a meeting with some online friends, maybe next time."

Urie and Shirazu heard the water in the bathroom stop running and raced to the door. Shirazu positioned himself so that he could reach out and rip Haise's towel down, while Urie was ready to jump out and take the picture.

The bathroom door swung open. It was as if everything turned to slow motion in this moment. One of Haise's feet slowly stepped out the door, Shirazu moved in towards his senior. Clasping his hand around the edge of the towel. In this moment Urie quickly placed himself in front of Haise, camera ready to take the picture. Shirazu removed the towel with one quick swipe, allowing for it to drop to the floor, as this happened, the camera flashed, taking the photo.

The two look at Haise, who had a surprised expression on his face.

"Sassan?"

"Yes?"

"WHY ARE YOU WEARING TWO TOWELS?!"

Haise's towel was left on the floor forgotten and his lower half was still covered by another towel that he had been wearing.

"Oh, well you see, I was going to use one for my hair and one for my body, but one went missing, haha. Well now I know where it is." Haise smiled casually and left the two stunned boys. They had not thought of what to do if this situation occurred.

"We won't give up (he must be an idiot, how would he have not realised he had a second towel on?). told Shirazu, more determined than before.

* * *

The next plan the two boys had thought of was sneaking into his room and waiting for him to get changed.

The two waited for him to leave the room and snuck in. the moment they set foot in the room, a dark aura took over the entire room.

"What do you two think you're doing?" An overly sweet tone greeted them.

The two boys turned to Haise to see a blank eyes, an overly friendly smile and a darkness seeping from him.

"N-nothing Sassan." Shirazu told him, gulping.

"Then why are you two entering my room without my consent?"

"We were going to see what kind of books you liked and what you already had, so we could buy you one." Urie lied.

"OOOooohhhh, well if that's the case.." Haise started, leading them further into his room. "Here are all my books."

The two looked up at his book shelf, surprised by how many were there, but suddenly the wall opened up behind the shelf to reveal a giant library of books. The two gasped. They didn't even know this existed, how had this goofy leader of theirs convince the higher ups to let him have this.

"Anyway, while you guys look, I'm gonna get changed, these clothes are getting hot." Haise told them, walking away.

Urie and Shirazu took the chance to pull out the camera. They waited for him to remove his shirt. His hands moved to his pants, chucking them to the floor. Then his underwear, his hands gripped the edge of the thin piece of fabric covering his downtown area, when suddenly.

"HELP, SASAKI!" there was banging on the door, and cries from Tooru. Haise grabbed a randome pair of shorts and threw them on racing to the door.

"What?" Haise asked in a serious tone.

"Saiko, sh-shes choking and I can't help her!" Haise ran out of the room, the two boys groaning. They had been so close, of course that NEET had to start choking now!

* * *

A few days later the squad heard that they will be taking on an A rank ghoul, meaning there is a high chance that clothes would be shredded. The two boys knew that this was their chance.

Haise had gotten them to withdraw from the battle, they watched as the ghoul shot spike towards him with it Kagune. Haise was hit a lot he no longer had a shirt, and he had a few cuts down his arms that were quickly healing themselves. Suddenly the ghoul attack Haise again. Not only that but it hit lower on his body. The pants covering his legs, slowly started to fall to pieces, starting from the bottom, working its way towards his groin. But it didn't make it. The clothes stopped shredding just below his underwear line. The two groaned while the others of their squad gave them odd stares, wondering why they were so disappointed.

After the battle they went home. Urie lacking the motivation to continue this silly game.

"We still have time to do it!" Shirazu said to the boy.

"You know what, I don't feel like doing this anymore (idiot, the world is working against us)." Urie replied. Shirazu sighed in defeat.

"How about we go to that bath house that was opened nearby." The sharp toothed boy suggested.

"Sure, why not (nothing better to do)."

The two walked quietly to their locations and soon they were relaxing in the warm water of the bath house. Suddenly the door was opened. They turned to see who it was.

Haise had walked in, towel wrapped around his neck, like a cape. Smiling cheerfully, and allowing the world to see his ding dong. He had no shame at all.

"Oh, Urie and Shirazu? You're here as well?" said boys gaped at the white and black haired male. They could see everything, from the white ends of the hair to the black roots.

"S-SASSAN, HOW DID YOU GET YOUR STYLIST TO DYE IT THAT COLOUR?"

"huh?"

"…(WHAT THE HELL!?)"

"I told you it was natural….what, you didn't believe me?" Haise smiled cheekily. He lifted his arms to expose the hair under there, the boys could see the back and white hairs.

They both felt like idiots, not just because they didn't believe him, but also because of the fact that it was so simple to find out. They could have faced the embarrassment of asking him to show them, its not like he had the shame to say no. The two now knew for certain that the carpets do match the drapes, and now whenever someone asks them, the two boys will not tell them anything. Just so that the person can go through the same hell they did to find out.

* * *

TIS DONE :D yAy

I hope you all enjoyed this weird fanfic 030….as I said earlier, this is a prequel, so if highly recommend reading the following one 'Um, Kaneki?' on my channel ;D

Thank you for reading, please review, and I hope to see you guys again in another fic ba bye ;)


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